Covey’s Speed of Trust 11: 1st & 2nd Behaviors

This continues our review of Stephen M. R. Covey’s Speed of Trust. I still encourage you to buy the book and study it repeatedly

Covey cautions against behaving in extremes on any of the 13 behaviors. He uses a bell chart to emphasize the point. Divide the bell curve into four parts, call each a quartile.  The ends represent extremes. You behave too little in the first quartile and too much in the fourth quartile (two tales or ends) of the curve. We behave in the “sweet spot” in the second and third quartiles (the bulge of the curve). This applies equally to all 13 Behaviors.

Behavior 1: Talk Straight

• “Be honest. Tell the truth. Let people know where you stand. Use simple language. Call things what they are. Demonstrate integrity.”
• “The opposite of Talk Straight is to lie or to deceive
• “Counterfeit behaviors include beating around the bush, withholding information, double-talk (speaking with a forked tongue), flattery, positioning, posturing, and the granddaddy of them all: ‘spinning’ communication in order to manipulate the thoughts, feelings, or actions of others.”

Let me share an example. I worked for an organization that bred counterfeit behaviors. They appointed a new director. He talked straight. He never used hidden agendas or spun things. Previous administrations jaded us so badly that it took two years to recognize he talked straight. Trust built exponentially once we recognized this trait.

Behavior 2: Demonstrate Respect

• “There are two critical dimensions to this behavior—first, to behave in ways that show fundamental respect for people; and second, to behave in ways that demonstrate caring and concern.” Show respect in the little things.
• “The opposite  of Demonstrate Respect is to not respect other people.”
• “The counterfeit of Demonstrate Respect is to fake respect or concern, or, most insidious of all, to show respect and concern for some (those who can do something for you), but not for all (those who can’t).”

You can Talk Straight with less offense when you Demonstrate adequate Respect .

Friday we review the 3rd and 4th behaviors create transparency and right wrongs